Are Bottoms Unmanly? It got me thinking about the power play between the men in my books, and the power play in the books that I read.
When I was a teenager, I read hundreds of Mills & Boon and Barbara Cartland because that's what my mother read. This was before the days of rampant sex on every page. There were heaving bosoms aplenty, but always modestly covered. The books that used to drive me insane were where the girl was wetter than limp celery. I may have been young but I knew that I liked my women feisty... Not much has changed.
I may have exchanged she for he but if the guy has got no balls I am an unhappy Sue. Now, my friend, Tom, thinks I'm a bratty individual and he's probably right. In my books, topping from the bottom is a common occurrence. That is why I am hopeless at writing BSDM. Master/Slave - forget it. Wash up your own dishes, you lazy toerag. Sorry, I digress into domesticity. I admire,writers that can write Master and slave, and not have me throwing my coffee at the screen.
Back to guys with balls, and a less defined relationship. Although as a woman, I have never seen that being penetrated in consensual sex is in anyway submissive, you are, as Matthew says, the receptive partner. Okay, there is pegging and all variations under the sun, but should being penetrated affect your status within a relationship? Hell no.
So whichever position I have my men in, it doesn't affect what they are within their partnership. Now, is this because I am female? That I cannot appreciate the nuances of power within a male/male relationship? Or is that I like my men to be... well... feisty? I don't know the answer and I'd appreciate your input.